oh! I think I'll wear a dress

Rule #1 of Suramerica: Don't you dare flush that toilet paper.

2011-12-07T22:51:00.000-05:00

I'm home and flushing toilet paper like a maniac.

when youre lucid youre the sweetest thing

2010-08-26T03:31:00.003-04:00

I left the house once today to pick up the paper. Other than that, I slept all day. I'm sick right now, okay? Anyway, sometimes when your time is spent lounging around lifelessly, a thought or two is bound to enter consciousness without even asking. You can't help it. It just happens. Sigh, what a bother.

Things I have to try at least once before I die
1. switch subway cars while the train is in motion
2. watch The Ring full with my eyes open the whole movie
3. censored
4. talk about my feelings with another human being
5. climb a mountain

Adventurous. High standards! I'm thinking I might be able to manage everything on this list some time within the next five years if I'm ambitious. With the exception of number 2. That one's just a killer. At least number 5 is not cliche or anything.

I really like to climb. Not like, emotionally or anything (see Miley Cyrus' The Climb). But like, you know, just for fun. Physically, I mean.

Come on...it's a little funny.

2010-04-15T14:06:00.001-04:00

happens to me everytime

2010-04-09T17:35:00.001-04:00

buttercupfestival.com

2010-03-05T15:19:00.004-05:00

You know what kills my printing balance? The daily SuDoku. Ten cents a day to play around with some numbers? I've got to make some changes.

It was sunny out today. So naturally, every girl on campus pulled out their mini skirt to wear. I mean, it was only 36 degrees, BUT THERE WAS SUNSHINE! So clearly that makes it mini skirt day here at Geneseo. Ladies and gentlemen, logic.

2010-02-27T06:37:00.005-05:00

In the news: I was feeling really bold and daring this morning, so I redesigned.. with the replacement of my former blog template for another one that is equally plain in sight. You know what they say about makeovers!!!

Quick! What do you think of when you hear Thom Yorke hauntingly repeating the words: Little babies' eyes, eyes, eyes? Answer: scary dead baby scene from Trainspotting. Am I right? It's just what I've been thinking.

2010-02-20T15:15:00.000-05:00

I've heard a lot of people-- mostly young people, say that they don't like Charles Dickens. Well, I just read three of his novels and I'm gonna go ahead and say that I like him. I'm also going to start asking people whether they prefer the original or revised ending of Great Expectations. And then I'm going to judge them according to their answer.

It's always a little sad the moment you realize that life has taken its toll on one of your bathing suits and its your job to move it on to its afterlife as a drag suit.

Anywho, I should really go grocery shopping. I just had bread for lunch.

Time is contagious, everybody's getting old.

2010-02-18T00:23:00.000-05:00

I just found out that J.D. Salinger died. This is slightly old news, I know. Lately I haven't been as web-explorative as usual. It seems awful cliche as an adolescent to write about the profoundness of Catcher in the Rye, so I'll keep it brief. I remember the night I stayed up and read it whole, and I remember how ironically un-alone I felt after reading it. I don't like it when people make fun of the book. I understand that there's this constant reoccurring theme that says: Life Sucks, but who can't relate to a little teenage turmoil every now and then? I wrote this in my notebook this past summer haha:

Whenever I wander central park I like to pretend I'm Holden Caulfield, walking familiar streets and narrating a senseless and sulky life.

http://www.newsweek.com/id/232740/page/1 I have the 1991 print! Which one do you have?? I remember buying this copy because it was the cheapest one at the bookstore.

So, J.D. Salinger, your short stories are weird, but thank you by and bye for Catcher in the Rye. I wish I could hug you. I don't really know what "by and bye" means, but it sounds alright in this context.

Well, I wrote it and I was not inflamed one bit.

2010-02-05T15:20:00.001-05:00

I realized I haven't been to a concert at my school since high school. Road trips were so fun, especially the ones that started as soon as the first of your friends passed their road test. Other things I remember about high school:

wishing so badly that I was good at sports every other day in gym class
my sister poetically rewriting all my papers up until junior year
walking my dog to the pond everyday after school with Molly Bell
the first words I read by Ralph Waldo Emerson (oh, to fall in love with words)
the first words I read by Henry David Thoreau (oh, to fall in love with words, all over again, twenty minutes later)
a friendship pact to see DMB in concert every summer for the rest of our lives
public speaking: the only bad grade I ever got in an English class
PIG project: Methamphetamine Lab Detection in Tioga County. I never knew how poorly we did in that class until report cards came out. Who knew that laughing at drugs while raising awareness would be considered unacceptable? Not me.
warm keystone beer
sexing fruit flies in biology lab
a mid-January camping trip up in the mountains of Candor
a food coma induced nap that struck every afternoon during Calculus class

3. When you are cutting your bangs anywhere near the natural fall of the eyebrow lines....Guess what?! This is totally the dangerzone. I'll say it again. This is the DangerZone. Why? Because this is the one point where you have to take into account that the weight of the length of the bangs that you are cutting off has a way of defying gravity. So what does that mean? It means that the hairline and the growth patterns of your hair might take over and cause your bangs to appear a lot shorter and in some cases your bangs will look like a stunt double for "There's something about Mary" and we all know what those bangs look like.

I was led to this after I cut my bangs wrong and googled, "I cut my bangs wrong." At first I was really flustered, but then I thought, Do I really care? Since when have I been known for having good hair, anyway?

2010-01-26T19:51:00.000-05:00

I caught about the last half hour of Predator on AMC the other night. It was the perfect way to end the night by reliving some good childhood fear. Silly Arnold Schwarz, don't you know that a breezy 22 years later Rule #2 would come to be declared as Double Tap? That is, assuming that zombies and aliens are basically the same. At least three people (give or take) are going to be very angry that I just said that.

While we're talking about zombieland, I liked the message of hope that was sent out to every average gaming loner. Someday, (and that day will be the day you become known as the last living boy in the country) you'll get that hot girl. And it's also probable that you may happen upon a chance encounter with Bill Murray. So, stay alive, slaughter some living dead, and just keep on trucking.

2010-01-16T23:45:00.000-05:00

I found my lost ipod of two years today! It was exciting because I gave up hope of finding it a long time ago. Listening to my old playlists was pretty weird. There was some fun stuff, a good amount of sad stuff, and a whole lot of Dave Matthews. Talk about nostalgia at its best.

How bad was that song that played for the Avatar credits. Wouldn't it have been so funny to hear Celine Dion's wholehearted voice at the end of the movie? And to think that if anyone knows how to get the gig of a lifetime for an old friend, it's James Cameron. Remember going to the theaters to see Titanic with your family and your mom actually having to cover your own eyes for you when Kate Winslet got nakie? I also remember that we got to go on a school night and bragging about it the next day to my friends.

2010-01-09T15:48:00.000-05:00

I held one book and one book only in my arms this morning during my entire stay at Barnes and Noble. It's a silly little cover and here it is. Just shows how long I can do nothing for.

I know what you're thinking. DON'T WORRY. I just happened to have with me some pen and paper to work out the problems with. I'm too poor to actually buy the book (turns out I have a serious problem with spending all my money on dresses that I never wear) so I'll most likely have to go back tomorrow for another looksies. Don't mind me, I'm just living the dream.

Cover up the blank spots hit me on the head.

2010-01-09T11:51:00.000-05:00

I'm thinking: why not post another one of your infamous lists? And thus, I present to you all:

The List of Xuan Phan's Irrational Dislikes
1. The Always PC People
2. Group Projects (with people)
3. The Bubbly Handwriting People
4. The Asthmatic Snorers and finally,
5. Cat People - for the love of god, please, just stop it.

Maybe I should work on eliminating the "people" part of each one of my dislikes.
But, better safe than sorry, you know what I mean?

But, like ivy, we grow where there is room for us.

2010-01-07T13:42:00.000-05:00

I don't know where it came from, but I found the book No one belongs here more than you: Stories by Miranda July on the bookshelf a few days ago and finished it this morning. I liked the writing style, but overall most of the content I found a little too weird. I'm not very artsy. Is that what it is you have to be to be able to appreciate really fucking weird?

If you are sad, ask yourself why you are sad. Then pick up the phone and call someone and tell him or her the answer to the questionn. If you don't know anyone, call the operator and tell him or her. Most people don't know that the operator has to listen, it is a law. Also, the postman is not allowed to go inside your house, but you can talk to him on public property for up to four minutes or until he wants to go, whichever comes first. - Miranda July

Um guys? I didn't like Mullholland Drive. Sorry. I mean, yes, after reading a few online explanations of the movie I guess I can say props for careful planning, but did anyone actually enjoy the movie while watching it? Let me rephrase. Did any heterosexual female actually enjoy the movie while watching it. And plus, can't you explain any unexplainable movie by playing the dream card? Seriously, I cannot be alone on this.

2010-01-03T19:57:00.000-05:00

In the news: I made the switch from Mozilla Firefox to Google Chrome. Why did Mozilla have to let me down? I used to love it more than any one (human being) should love another (internet web browser). For these reasons and more, change is a terrible thing I tell you.

http://www.globalnerdy.com/2009/12/16/how-fanboys-see-operating-systems/

http://www.osnews.com/story/19266

Forget about your House of Cards and I'll do mine.

2010-01-02T09:13:00.000-05:00

I can't sleep so I play minesweeper. Good grief, this reminds me of all four years of my life during high school and then some. And before I put those mad counting skillz to use, I watched the movie Up, which had me weeping within the first ten minutes. Weeping is a bit of an overstatement I guess, I'm sure.

Since it's all like, the new year, it would only be right to reflect a little since that is what people like to do and force others to do. And if you were to ask or force me to look back on this time a year ago, well, I'm pretty sure I was a wreck. We all know what it's like. The times of wallowing deep in self pity when drinking yourself to madman status is not quite enough and then the night has to eventually end in a connective (on your part only) cuddle session with your dog, which by that point you've convinced yourself to be the only one left in existence that still understands you. Say it with me now: Been There, Done That.

Okay, that's more than enough. What is this post?

I just want back in your head: memories of a booklover.

2009-11-23T19:20:00.000-05:00

Yep, I definitely stayed in bed and read my book all damn day. It's the sort of day when as it's approaching dusk I have to consciously think back with effort to try and remember at least some thing useful I did during the daytime. And if I'm unsuccessful in my search, well, I still fall asleep eventually anyway.

Urban Dictionary defines: Reader's Block

"Related to Writer's Block, this is when you cannot, for the life of you, pick up a book and read it. Sure, you may be able to read a paragraph or two, or maybe even a page, but you don't retain anything of what you just read or have the attention span and/or will to go on. This is common for those who have ADD, are in possession of garbage literature, or are just so exhausted from having to read so many books during school/college that reading anything else, even for pleasure, has become impossible. To those who love to read, this is worse than heart disease and cancer combined."

Gizmodo on Life:

"Some of the geeks you know may say they prefer sun and air, but at least a third of them are lying...Bookworms who live for lazy weekend reads...Bookworms are creatures of comfort who crave for little more than a peaceful corner and a good read..."

You wanted nobody to see you feel vulnerable around me.

2009-11-09T21:38:00.000-05:00

Oh yeah, so, I'm a morning person now. It's been about a week and a half so I think I can call it official. Can I just say that it is so nice to be able to sit down and eat breakfast? When does that ever happen anymore.

Body image is an interesting thing. Isn't it always the older women with less than perfect (according to cultural standards, of course) and far from priming bodies the ones who are always stripped down naked smack dab in the open of the locker rooms without a care in the world if anyone sees them? After you reach a certain age, or point in life rather, do you just stop caring and realize how silly it is to be self conscious about that sort of thing ? Anyway, my point is: some day I will finally reach puberty and hit that growth spurt that I've been waiting so long for.

Ohhhhh! So that's what happened.

You know how there's always that one day of the week when you make a meal out of all the left overs that have been crowding the fridge for days? I kind of like that day.

2009-10-31T11:40:00.000-04:00

I am so confused right now. I definitely thought yesterday was Halloween. Well, maybe all of Halloween weekend is meant to blur into one long night or something.
I can't stop laughing because if you know me at all then you know that this used to be my favorite song ever to sing dramatically drunk.

Wake up at an ungodly hour. Browse GoogleReader. Post Total Eclipse of the Moon Flowchart to blog because it's just that good. Go back to sleep. Check.

7 Bad Writing Habits you Learned in School

2009-10-29T16:21:00.000-04:00

This morning I made it to the library cafe early enough to be the first to snatch the only copy of The New York Times my school can afford anymore for the entire campus to share. Thank you, budget cuts. I thought it was really funny that there was an article called "Obama Girls get the Swine Flu Shots." Really?? Is it because he won a Nobel Peace Prize? Wait, why did he win that, again? It's old news but it's never too late to ask.

adorableness I found on gizmodo.com

Today was a pretty educational day. I went to a lecture on The Female Register and, which was oh so interesting. Made me think about how I say "um" and "like" too much in everyday speech. And then someone made a comment on how they read an article about how people who say "um" a lot are actually really intelligent because it signifies how they're always calculating in their minds for the best way of saying something. But I'm pretty sure that's not the case for me. I'm pretty sure I'm just bad at talking.

And then I sat in on a CompSci guest speaker from Google talk about file sharing. He had the coolest Israeli accent. And the lecture was pretty sweet, obviously, I mean, let's be honest. One day Google will rule the world.

um, AWESOME
http://www.psfk.com/2009/10/pic-origami-tea-bags-designed-to-expand-as-tea-steeps.html

I'll miss the playgrounds and animals and digging up worms.

2009-10-28T00:20:00.000-04:00

I have tonight free and they closed the pool again for repairs, so here we are by Bloc Party.

Typical all-nighter with, you know, just the basic essentials.

I stayed in Fraser last night with two other friends who who both ended up passing out in really awkward positions (why yes, I did take pictures) by 6am. I am so good at pulling all-nighters. I am so good at unhealthy things in general. I know my water looks a little murky, but its just lemon!

Today I thought about how I never write much anymore, so I started flipping through all my past ramblings from my my mini-moleskin, which I used to carry around with me everywhere, and here are some excerpts that I thought were pretty entertaining and don't mind sharing. Nothing is dated because I'm all young and stupid and not-caring like that, and I;m just trying to do my part by fitting neatly into stereotypes to avoid any confusion. Anyway, I'm pretty sure it's mostly all from summer and not too long before it.

I wear a white v-neck t shirt and jeans every single day and my backpack is bigger than my body.

Hm, this sounds like a silly John Mayer song. But slightly better and a lot less annoying. I save color and non-baggy t shirts for only special occasions, okay!?

I think I'm going to have to start learning how to drink coffee soon. Ugh, hi adulthood, you're just around the corner, aren't you.

Isn't it some sort of rite of passage to start hanging with the big kids or something? I never started drinking coffee, by they way, but maybe I should 'cause this semester is kicking. my. ass. I can already see it playing through in my mind: "Oh, so this is what it feels like to not make Dean's List. Apparently life goes on. Who knew?" Hopefully I can manage to stay this calm when the time comes. But you know what they say. Time spent wishing is time spent what is the saying, again?

"Because truly to enjoy bodily warmth, some small part of you must be cold, for there is no quality in this world that is not what it is merely by contrast. Nothing exists in itself." --Moby Dick by Herman Mellville

Now that I think about it, this reminds me of how much I like the Taoist idea of complimentarity of opposites. Remember how you weren't cool unless you had ying-yang signs drawn all over your notebooks and folders in school? I had a few ying-yang pogs, as well. I really wanted to be cool. And clearly, I was, based on the evidence. Inference, man.

He told me he thinks I'm "cute and girly." Give him a break, he's Asian... and not very poetic. And then, a few minutes after he dropped me off and we said goodnight he texted me: "Miss you already! See you in the dream." I wonder if there's a Funny Fob-liners website I can post this on.

HAHA I might always remember this. He wasn't so bad though. Definitely too old for me. My mom didn't seem to mind so much about that though, which was surprising. I was really proud of her for being able to resist calling at five minute intervals to check in the first time I went out with him. When I brought it up the next morning she said, "Well, I didn't want to bother you," and I thought, "Wow. That is so weird. Surely, this must be a trick."

and inevitably, a few pages later, but not necessarily as a direct result...

Well I've decided that I don't particularly enjoy the whole dating scene thing. I'll talk to my parents about arranging some sort of marriage and get back to you guys on how it works out for me.

I thought it was a pretty good idea. Although I'm not exactly known for taking healthy approaches in solving personal dilemmas. This also falls in sync with the fact that I will always, if not consciously, subconsciously sabotage anything good that ever comes my way. For some reason I always write as if speaking to an audience or something.

My uncle gave me his old phone today. It's kind of fancy shmancy...well nothing mega technical but nicer than any phone I've ever owned. It kind of makes me nervous...since i usually live by the general rule of thumb that I will eventually break and then/or lose everything I own. So..I don't know, this may prove to be problematic.

This one's funny because actually I did end up breaking that phone a few months later. In the most ridiculous way, mind you.

There was a time in my life when I watched Fresh Prince of Belaire every single night.

There was a time in my life when I watched Finding Nemo daily.

He called me like two hours after I game him my number. And I kind of really liked it. It's like, he doesn't want to play the game, I don't know how to play the game; it''s a win-win situation for us all.

Really though, no one ever taught me how to play the game of chase and be chased. (Okay, okay, so I was a late bloomer in more ways than one.) 'He's Just Not That Into You 2", anyone? That was a joke. Oh good god that was a joke.

I can see how it might seem like sarcasm, but it's really our way of secretly revealing the truth.

people who understand each other vs. people who don't

me: I haven't listened to Dim Sum Girl since summer!
nghi: Really? I listen to it at least once a week.

we. loved. that. song.

That's all. The rest are either too boring or too personal or too long to type out. I hope you had fun at my expense. And if you didn't, you can look at this: pretties!

They keep inventing new ways to celebrate mediocrity!

2009-10-03T12:39:00.000-04:00

I was talking to a dear old friend and we were having fun pointing out all of our flaws (namely in the social scenes). After hanging up I felt a whim to write up this list.. because, well, it's essentially what I got out of the conversation. Welcome back, me.

Top Ten Reasons to Not Be My Friend

10. I'm the most annoying person to watch scary movies with; I hide my face under a blanket the entire time and will inconsiderately say to the lucky person sitting next to me, "omigosh what's happening" every five seconds.

9. I never answer my phone.

8. Whenever I make plans more than one day ahead of time I forget about it.

7. Sometimes I am a really bad listener because I have the attention span of a toddler.

6. I am so un-photogenic it is ~~not even~~ funny. So after realizing this in life, I gave up all hope in trying and now purposefully make ugh faces, usually being the one to ruin an otherwise perfectly good picture in which everyone else and their mom looks smiley and delightful.

5. If want to be alone but situation doesn't permit I will probably just stop talking and stare in the other direction while I live inside my mind for a while. This usually makes most people feel pretty awkward.

4. I always want to be alone and situation almost never permits.

3. If you ever ask me where I want to eat out my answer will always be McDonald's. Yesterday, today, and tomorrow. So just don't give me the option.

2. I would choose staying in bed to read over going out six out of seven nights of the week.

1. I have a really dorky Talking Heads ring tone and it would just be utterly embarrassing to be seen with me in public if my phone ever went off.

Off campus life is nice. I feel, um, healthier. I've actually been getting those five servings of vegs a day in, which is like, I know. so weird. I could never help myself in the dining hall whenever there was greasy right in front of my face. It used to be like, "Okay anna, do whatever helps you sleep at night and eat french fries with every meal," it was so bad.

Katherine Sherwood's
Orobas II, 2000, mixed media on canvas

I love her colors and her general style and her everything else, but oh god my OCD just cannot get past the uneven composition of things in most of her work.

Speaking of awesome, I finally got myself back in the pool where I belong. Is there anything better than the high after a nice long swim? I almost forgot the feeling.

Good morning, Mr. Incredible. It is psychotic.

Come disconnect the dots with me poppet come disconnect.

2009-07-29T00:08:00.000-04:00

havesomehats.com

The best part about living alone must be not having to wear clothes all the time. Now am I right or am I right, everyone?

2009-07-28T01:04:00.000-04:00

mom: can you take out the garbage for me?
me: but mom i'm not wearing pants!
mom (looks at me like i'm pathetic): no, just because you never wear pants in the house doesn't mean you don't have to do anything around here

Can someone please create a rule stating otherwise? I mean, jeepers.

I'm usually an against-the-waller or a second row sleeper (on a good day). I miss school. Like the actual school part of school. Now is that sad or is that sad, everyone?

cold mango, unposed photographs, the smell of jasmine tea

2009-07-21T01:32:00.000-04:00

I love being away from the internet for a while and coming back to an abundance of good material in all my webpages that have been updated and unchecked for days.

Today I bought a book from Starbucks? There's a first for everything I suppose. I needed somewhere to sit down and coffee is yuck and loitering is bad I heard. I really like the atmosphere in those places, the music especially! Although free internet would be nice.

playing hooky,

the first page of a book,
writing about it,
a moment alone.
--a sign in Starbucks

I just read up all about Megaman on wikipedia so my 10 year old cousin will consider me interesting enough to talk to. Of course I'm babysitting what must be the only kid in the world who doesn't like to play outside. Sadface. Wistful face. Ugh face. Normal face.

havesomehats.com

So those new HSBC ads that are all over streets are pretty clever. Here's one.

This is just one of them pointing on Trendy/Tradition. Google image for a lot more!

My mom and I cleaned all day today since we're letting some of my uncle's friends from abroad stay at our place during their visit. We don't even know them! Weird. It makes me a little uneasy. But well, wouldn't you be? Or is it just my people problem thing again?

And all of our parents they're getting older. I wonder if they've wished for anything better.

2009-07-12T14:19:00.000-04:00

My dad has a season of Blue Planet downloaded...so that's what I did for the first three hours of my morning. Nice anna, keep being so good at life.

It's weird. He's already looking at Delaware houses for retirement. I'm pretty sure his life dream is to just live by the bay and wake up every morning to go fishing. It made me sad to think about leaving Apalachin. I mean, even though the house we grew up in is not much of a home anymore, I still find myself with a deep emotional attachment. Then again, I'm sure we're all familiar with my overwhelmingly nostalgic tendencies by now.

I like to lay on the beach and listen to soft music with the volume loud enough to drown out surrounding chatter but low enough to hear the waves crashing behind me. Oh, and occasionally eat the moon. Mmm, tasty.

They remind me of each other. Like they lived the same line life. Or something.

SUNGHA JUNG. Youtube him now, please.

2009-07-02T18:39:00.000-04:00

It's called Musical Minds and a really amazing program. It's posted on the NOVA site, but only for seven days (starting yesterday) so watch watch watch it now! (about an hour long)

Why hello again my little red nissan. How I've missed you so.

2009-06-30T21:33:00.000-04:00

I was eating at a buffet today. They put the "Spinach" right next to the "Spinach with Cheese." Oh plain spinach, you never even had a chance.

This guy on the food network said that there are two kinds of people: people who love fried food and people who won't admit they love fried food. I can safely say that I have never at any point in my life considered myself to be of the latter.

Know what I've been doing a lot lately? Confusing dreams with reality. Och I'm going crazy.

I can listen to this song on repeat for so long.

You and the moon are a beautiful sight to me.

2009-06-30T02:33:00.000-04:00

My mom got me the centennial edition of Atlas Shrugged today, which is the one I've been wanting for so so long, and a new graph-paged moleskin journal. Yippee-yayers, I'm happy.

I don't know. Just messing around at the park, I guess. My mom fell asleep and I was bored.

"They love nothing better than sipping free-trade gourmet coffee, leafing through the Sunday New York Times, and listening to David Sedaris on NPR (ideally all at the same time.) Apple products, indie music, food co-ops, and vintage T-shirts make them weak in the knees. " -Stuff White People Like, by Christian Lander

I think everyone should buy this, read it, and laugh out loud. The first time I picked up a copy I read it cover to cover. Someone's calling us out, guys, and it's freaking hilarious. I won't lie - at several times throughout the book, I've had to claim myself as guilty.

The future freaks me out. Like, really, really, really, a lot.

2009-06-28T14:10:00.000-04:00

http://news.nationalgeographic.com/news/2009/06/090624-walking-expression-robot-video-ap.html

2009-06-26T20:14:00.000-04:00

2009-06-26T16:08:00.000-04:00

My belt holds up my pants and my pants have belt loops that hold up the belt. What the fuck's really going on down there? Who is the real hero? -the dearest Mitch Hedberg

In the north village they're talking of giving up the lottery.

2009-06-26T02:21:00.000-04:00

Seeing beyond what is on the surface. Moving both eyes and a nose to the side of the face. Dicing bodies and tables and guitars as if they were celery sticks, and rearranging them so that you have to really see them to see them. Amazing. What did the world look like to him? -Speak, Laurie Anderson (an early adolescent favorite) p.s. cached is pretty : )

"Adolescence had taken away the softness of his voice and had made him silent and definitely solitary, but, on the other hand, it had restored the intense expression that he had had in his eyes when he was born." -One Hundred Years of Solitude, Gabriel Garcia Marquez

I first read The Lottery by Shirley Jackson when I was sixteen and was so enthralled by the simple moral that I found a way to reference it in just about every essay I wrote in class for the rest of the year. I think it still might possibly be my favorite short story - although I haven't read very many since 7th grade literature. For those of you who have never had the fortune of reading her words, enjoy. http://www.classicshorts.com/stories/lotry.html

In a little creepy world. Little creepy girl with her little creepy face. Saying funny things that you have never heard.

2009-06-25T02:26:00.000-04:00

I randomly turned on the tv earlier and and found an amazing program on PBS. It was called The Music Instinct: Science and Song. A lot of interesting stuff. Sometimes I forget that there are actually things worth watching on tv. I think I need to tune into PBS more often . Anyway, one topic in particular that especially caught my attention was finding certain things about music that are universal across time and culture, and setting apart those that are not. It's surprising what was determined as culturally imprinted. It's always fun to take a step back and realize that certain attitudes or things felt or known that seem so inherent are actually learned, rather than instinctual.

I was originally looking for my favorite PBS Be More Inspired commercial (couldn't find it, sadly) when I found this. I like it - it warms my heart. We were all so curious. Let's go back.

(http://www.pbs.org/wgbh/nova/ Look around just for fun! There's a lot of good stuff.)

Occasionally, my uncle gets tickets for my mom and I to shows at the art theater. On Monday we went to a magic show at Bleecker and I really wasn't expecting to enjoy it as much as I did. I think it's fun not even wondering how they pull of the tricks. I just allow myself to be utterly impressed without question. (It's funny how I always find a way to contradict myself, even within blog posts.)

I can't wait to have my own house. So I will actually have a reason to shop at Crate&Barrel. Instead of just walking around staring at everything longingly. Some day.

Today I read parts of 100 Years of Solitude and Love in the Time of Cholera that I had bookmarked from a while back. Marquez's writing is so sweet and beautiful in the most melancholy and wistful way. Seriously, no one gets the tears to pour quite like Marquez does. I wonder what his life was like. I can only imagine what he went through to know what such sad things feel like. It kind of breaks my heart to think about it. Also, magical realism seems like a fun little too - hard to pull off though, definitely.

I can do the frug; you'll never see my eyes.

2009-06-20T21:12:00.000-04:00

My brother from another mother made this for me (I'm making a conscious effort to become more ghetto). It gave me a pretty good laugh so here it is. It;s so me, right?

I spent way too much money on really beautiful shoes today. Sometimes I think you can find the same exact things in Urban Outfitter in Salvation Army for only like a bajillion dollars cheaper. God I wish I could afford Urban Outfitter.

Has anyone seen that new Pride and Prejudice zombie-type book? It's all over stores and I always find myself staring at the front cover for some reason. I don't even like zombies.

p.s. perhaps I'm being paranoid, but just a quick note: you shouldn't take anything I say in this little blog too too seriously or we'll both be in trouble, ya hear? Also, you are allowed to judge me, but just make sure I don't find out so we can both sleep happy at night.

I'm not a fan of orange, but it's been catching my eye lately.

2009-06-19T05:29:00.000-04:00

I can't sleep? This may be because I slept until noon today and went to bed at midnight the night before. Note to self: stop it. I've been writing some short stories. They're neat.

http://www.doghatesme.com/.a/6a01156fe52312970c01157119705d970b-pi

Randy said the funniest thing today. We were out at lunch randomly talking about race issues and he goes, "We're so much better than white people." I'm sure this would be funnier if I explained the context of the story, but it's just too long and I'm not feeling ambitious. Well that was pointless. Anywho, the rest was just a typical randy/anna conversation.

You know, I would probably be so in love with you if you actually respected girls and had just a little bit of a better personality. I mean, really.

And I would love you back if you weren't such a cynical wench.

It's moments like these when we just smile at each other and continue eating. We've got an honest thing going on. It's all about the friendship, guys. You do it for the friendship.

I took my little cousin to his Tae Kwon Do lesson today and it was pretty darn cute.

Remember when we were really small and limber? Those were the good days.

But just being around you offers me another form of relief.

2009-06-18T02:14:00.000-04:00

I hate walking through the city streets passing newsstand after newsstand (wow, I never knew "newsstand" is spelled that way - thanks spell check, for making sure I really do learn something new everyday) and not being able to just pick up a nytimes like how I do at school. College campuses spoil you that way. And god knows I'm just too cheap to shell out the two dollars a day to find out what's going on in the world. Especially when there's a two dollar hot dog stand right accross the street. If you're judging me right now, that was a joke. I'm not as terrible as I make myself seem sometimes. But then there are other times.

I hate the sound a woman in heels makes as she walks through a semi-quiet area of people. It's like, "Click, click, click. Hey everybody, look at me! I woke up this morning and tried!"

I remember we were talking about beauty magazines once in my Adolescent Development class and my professor asked one girl if she read Cosmo. With a chuckle, she smugly replied, "No, I'm an intellectual." A few girls (who were too proud to admit any shame) stuck up their noses. I just sat there and laughed. I mean, seriously. I've flipped through one of those before and I'm pretty sure stuff like that makes women dumber.

pg. 17 Take this quiz to see what your vagina says about your personality!

pg. 38 What to look for in a man because we all know you aren't capable of deciding this for yourself!

pg. 42 How to brainwash any guy into falling head over heels in love with you because maintaining honor and dignity in a relationship is completely out of the question!

So, surprisingly I did yoga with my mom today, which is a huge rarity. She's been trying to get me to go to classes with her since I was like 17. Once in a while I'll do some on my own but I just think that I'm generally not enough of a patient and relaxed person to enjoy that sort of stuff. It's also hard for me to not fall over every five seconds.

I think Charles Schulz and I would have been great friends.

2009-06-15T00:00:00.000-04:00

This afternoon I decided that I missed my mom too much to a point I could no longer handle. So I canceled all my doctor appointments, took a bus to the city, and surprised her at the door. It was fun. I'm just glad she was there because I did not want to go to grandma's. I'll miss you grass and trees, but sometimes mom is where the home is.

On the way there while driving at a descent speed through a dark tunnel with orange lights, Climbing Up the Walls by Radiohead came on. It was creepy, it was amazing, and I loved every second. Definitely something to experience.

I've been meaning to read the new David Sedaris. However, his books are of a few that I consider worth reading but not worth buying to own. A copy to borrow, anyone? If not, I suppose I could just spend a few hours in the book store and get it over with. Hehe! I love when I can correspond my thoughts so appropriately to particular xkcd comics in mind. It might be the best feeling in the world. I know, I'm obsessed.

I still have never been to MOMA. Maybe I'll finally get a chance to do that soon. Although it would be nicer to go with my sister - or any artist, just to get some knowledgeable commentary or something something something. Delete repeated word? Naw.

Alright. Peace out boys and girls.

I always judge a book by its cover and you.

2009-06-13T16:23:00.000-04:00

Look what I found! Hehe...oh the olden day. Pretty cool? We love you, internet.

I just took like the most pathetic four hour nap. That's what happens when I'm foolish enough to let myself do what I want. To be fair, I did wake up this morning way too early and way too hungover for life if you know what I mean.

Get loved. Make more. Try to stay alive.

2009-06-11T12:11:00.000-04:00

This is from Dog Hates Me. I don't really like it that much but every once in a while I'll find a good one that makes me smirk at least. It's not really worth checking regularly though.

People will not stop talking about Drag me to Hell. My brother said even NPR gave it good ratings. I may have to go see it and give up being able to sleep at night for a while.

I just ate half a bag of dried apricots. Yumyumyum. I should get out of bed.

Wanted: good inspiration. Will pay by cash or friendship.

2009-06-10T19:48:00.000-04:00

CSI is so interesting and well written but I can't watch it without being severely disturbed - like it actually causes me distress. But I'm not ashamed of this at all. I think too many people are able to watch things like that without feeling anything. It's a serious case of desensitization, and that's not a good thing if you ask me.

http://news.nationalgeographic.com/news/2009/05/090506-cloaking-device-star-trek.html

I don't even know what they're talking about. My boy HP has ancestors who discovered the invisibility cloak like a million years ago (Rowling 1999). It's really nothing new, NatGeo. Okay, but really, that's pretty cool...kind of scary. (Which is what science is all about, right?) I expect great new inventions for the future, like flying cars and robotic lawn mowers and pillows that will hug you back at night.

Wow, I just googled robotic lawn mowers out of curiosity and apparently they exist. Unfortunately for me, I can't say the same for the pillows.

Mawwiage is what bwings us togethaw today.

2009-06-09T03:43:00.000-04:00

The wedding was really beautiful and so heartwarming. Also, French is undoubtedly the most beautifully spoken language of all, yes? I wish wish wish I could speak it. Wish, wish, wish.

My sister and I were having a conversation with my aunt about certain aspects we dislike of traditional Asian and American culture. And then she brought up how our family is constantly striving to take only the best from both worlds. And I realized how much I love that about us. We're all constantly growing together - parents and kids, all continuously learning from each other. Family is a good thing.

This lady at the store was horribly mean to me today. And to quote Mulan's grandmother, I was all like, "Man, who spit in her bean curd?" I remember when little things like that would ruin my day completely. I've learned to handle unpleasant situations in a better way, though. Thank goodness for that. And by "better," I mean not being so completely helpless anymore.

This kind of goes along with a quoted line in one of my previous posts: If you think Education is expensive, try Ignorance. I remember complaining one day about how expensive books are and my little cousin Matthew whipped out this fun fact he learned in school at me. He said that the amount of information found in one National Geographic magazine is more than the amount of information known by a 17th century man or women in a lifetime. And then I felt foolish for complaining. It's so amazing, right? Just to think about.

Some comic relief from Randall Munroe to me and you.

2009-06-09T02:47:00.001-04:00

Seriously though, aren't there so many (well, atleast a few) words that aren't really words that you think should become words in the English language. Like, there are some nouns that I think should be able to be made into verb form. Who are you supposed to go see to arrange making such changes? Really, I kind of want to know.

I wonder if she's much like me, if she's what you need.

2009-06-04T02:49:00.000-04:00

Well tonight was interesting. And in this case, I'm using "interesting" as a sort of euphemism for "completely horrible." I think I lost my sense of humor entirely somewhere between the moment a room full of people burst out laughing at the sound of someone saying "blowjob" and having to walk through downtown Binghamton at 10:30 at night all the while being approached by strangers. I don't know if I'm just like too boring or something, or why I can't just be normal and enjoy the company of most other people ...whatever.

Onto a somewhat cheerier topic: Whenever I hear Peace Train by Cat Stevens, I always have to play Love Train right afterward. It just seems right to me. There's just a certain way things should be done in life, you know?

I really like the idea of fallibalism. Of course, there's a fine distinction between fallibalism and (what I've read to be) skepticism. It makes me think of something my professor said once. It was something along the lines of: Everything you think/say is biased; that's why you have to read like crazy. It's true; you can (well, more like 'should') never really stop educating yourself.

Together, Calvin and Hobbes complete me.

There's this bumper sticker: If you think Education is expensive, try Ignorance. I love it. If you're going to pay for anything in this world, it might as well be to gain knowledge.

With tired eyes, tired minds, tired souls, we slept.

2009-06-03T00:53:00.000-04:00

You know those moments when you discover something really profound that may or may not be life changing and you're like, "Wow, who knew? Well now I do and I'm going to be sure to tell my children!" Yeah, I had like four of them today.

For all you who are up for a nice little challenge: http://xkcd.com/blue_eyes.html
It's kind of fun trying to figure it out until you reach that point where you want to kill someone because you can't figure it out. I miss playing Professor Layton...

Oh Linus, we look forward to it, too. We really do.

My fingers are cold. Don't say a word. Be still.

2009-05-29T03:42:00.000-04:00

Again, please attribute to xkcd.

Sometimes I think that people get way into dream interpretation. To me, the whole thing is overrated (like Malcolm Gladwell books). I think you should just take dreams for what they are: really bizarre. That's kind of the beauty in it and it's just fun to accept complete absurdity sometimes. Sometimes reading into things will only ruin it, or take away from it, or something. Or at least I think so. Screw attempts at trying to understand the unconscious once in a while, you know?

One autumn you said to me: There's too much stuff around.

2009-05-27T15:14:00.000-04:00

I was in the waiting room at the doctor's office this morning and all the non-stupid magazines were taken so I started browsing through the children's books, and found a childhood favorite!!! Morris Goes to School. The reunion was thoroughly heartwarming. I remember the first time I ever encountered the word "thoroughly." It was on my list of words to study for the fourth/fifth grade spelling bee. I remember thinking it was pronounced as "though-roughly." Hehe, that's a tricky word though, you have to admit. Anyway, I got second place the next day and still won a prize, but remember thinking that it was one of the most upsetting moments I had ever lived. Probably because I lost to a fourth-grade boy. And boys are stupid. Everyone knows so.

Sometimes I like to listen to one after the other. They put you in such different moods, but are both amazing in their own way. The Jose Gonzalez version is so beautiful; I always feel sort of a sense of guilt when I like a cover version more than the original. Like how I prefer Dispatch's cover of Stir it Up (one day I got bored and downloaded every cover I could find of the song...just because EVERYONE covers it)over Bob Marley's original :( Sorry Bob. Remember in I am Legend when that girl didn't know who Bob Marley was but knew Damien Marley? How is that even possible? I mean I know the entire movie is fiction but that particular bit is extra fiction.

I went to the store and found perfect shoes for my outfit. I ended up having to order them though, but got a three dollar discount since the store didn't have my size in stock. Good deal. I just hope they come in on time for the wedding. Oh well, I was planning on going barefoot during the reception, anyhow. Wearing heels is a tricky skill that I have not yet pursued in this lifetime.

Then I did dinner on Hilton with the Phans (where I accidentally threw away my retainers and had to dig through the garbage) and did some of my cousin's math homework just for fun (combining radicals). Doing math homework used to be like my favorite thing to do ever. Just because it was so simple and it made sense and there was always only one right answer. And it was the only work I could get done while listening to music. (I was reading this article about attention span and there was this one line, "...multi-tasking is a myth.." and I was like, Thank God! I've spent my entire life thinking there was something wrong with me because I have never been able to do it.)

Thanks Rilo, Is this one for me?

2009-05-26T12:15:00.000-04:00

your ship may be coming in; you're weak but not giving in
and sometimes when you're on you're really fucking on
and your friends they sing along and they love you
but the lows are so extreme that the good seems fucking cheap
and it teases you for weeks in its absence
but you'll fight and you'll make it through
you'll fake it if you have to
and you'll show up for work with a smile
and you'll be better you'll be smarter
more grown up and a better daughter
or son and a real good friend
and you'll be awake and you'll be alert
you'll be positive though it hurts
and you'll laugh and embrace all your friends
and you'll be a real good listener
you'll be honest you'll be brave
you'll be handsome and you'll be beautiful
you'll be happy

looking grey in the rain as they stand disarrayed

2009-05-26T03:38:00.000-04:00

PhotoBooth is probably among the top five greatest and most hilarious ways to pass time when bored. Look at that face. I'm like a model, basically. And just generally ecstatic to be alive. I would totally wear glasses like those. They're so fitting.

I just deleted 58 screennames from my buddylist. I have no idea why I still had so many of people I don't even talk to anymore. I was thinking of doing the same for facebook (which I've decided to revive, by the way), but I feel like that would get offensive. Maybe I'll move to my phone contact list next.

I saw a baby deer with an injured leg limping today. I wanted to hug it with all my heart and half my soul and the little bit of what's left of my dignity. I was so sad.

That's what careless words do.

2009-05-25T04:45:00.000-04:00

We went to the flea market today! I like to just browse. I picked up Lord of the Flies for fifty cents so that was pretty cool beans and guacamole. I hope I like it.

And then we saw a hummingbird at the nature preserve and it was so cute so I said hi.

My brother tried to make me play frisbee with him earlier. I think I lasted a total of thirty seconds before I started complaining and collapsed to the grassy ground into a deep daydream. When people ask me to play catch or something, they're basically asking, "Hey, do you want to stand across from each other some distance apart while I throw things at you?" I just wasn't born with the ability to catch. Actually, I just have a lot of natural inadequacies. And deformities, for that matter.

I'm listening to the album Instrumental Magic right now. Good stuff. My dad used to play it all the time when we were little. What a blast from the past. I might as well throw in a Beach Boys album while I'm doing the childhood music thing.

spend a little time and we can do whatever

2009-05-23T12:57:00.000-04:00

I hate when people forget to turn their highbeams off as they're driving past you. It's like, "wow, I really hope I don't hit you..or anything...or die, but thanks to you and your negligence, there will be absolutely no way of telling."

I know, right! What's with that, anyway? I'm sure everyone has recognized a link between higher creativity levels and depression. It kind of reminds me of this one line I read somewhere: The difference between genius and insanity is timing.

"One evening he spoke. Sitting at her feet, his face raised to her, he allowed his soul to be heard. 'My darling, anything you wish, anything I am, anything I can ever be...That's what I want to offer you - not the the things I'll get for you, but the thing in me that will make me able to get them. That thing - a man can't renounce it - but I want to renounce it - so that it will be yours - so that it will be in your service - only for you.' The girl smiled and asked: 'Do you think I'm prettier than Maggy Kelly?' He got up. He said nothing and walked out of the house. He never saw that girl again." --The Fountainhead

I got a descent chuckle out of this even though it sort of made me want to cry internally. Don't you just love revelations and what they do to you? I remember playing Never Have I Ever a long time ago and one girl was like, "Never have I ever had a crush on a dumb bitch...EVERY STRAIT MAN DRINK NOW." It was a fun time. Of course it goes both ways.

I picked out really dorky frames yesterday at my eye appointment. They're fun.

I've got stars in my beard and I feel real weird for you.

2009-05-22T11:15:00.000-04:00

I've been camping a lot. Well, just over nights in my backyard, but still. There's something about sleeping outside on the ground in a small confined space that I just can't say no to. The only downside I've noticed so far about my tent is that you can't really star gaze with the fly on. But other than that, it's not so bad.

Also (I don't know why I feel that the world should know, but), I really hate motorcycles. They are so...not..stealthy (for lack of a better criticism). Or maybe it's like they're a perversion of the good old bicycle or something. If I lived in a small town with sidewalks and shops I would totally ride my bike everywhere.

I don't think I'm that ashamed of being American; although, it's possible that I'm still too ignorant to know any better. But I do hate getting older. Aside from the whole 'gaining-responsibilities' thing, I think it's something about feeling really unaccomplished or something. I don't really know...just because the years keep building up and I'm still just as clueless as ever. I need to keep up with time, as much as I hate to say that. But I'm obviously just not able to live in the moment so I guess I'll just have to cross Zen Buddhism off my 'possible methods of attaining happiness and inner peace' list.

"I find people confusing. This is for two main reasons. The first main reason is that people do a lot of talking without using any words. Siobhan says that if you raise one eyebrow it can mean a lot of different things. It can mean "I want to do sex with you" and it can also mean "I think that what you just said was very stupid."

That's from that Curious Doggy book. I'm about 99% sure that's not what it's really called. Anyway, I read it years ago when it first came out as a best seller, didn't really get into it then, and just read it again yesterday morning. There are some books you just have to re-read a few years later to enjoy.

Sadly, I found myself able to relate to Dostoevsky's Notes from Underground more than any human being probably should. That's most definitely not a good thing. I just hope I'm not still like this at 40 like he was. Cross your fingers, please and thank you!

I was recently wondering why I even own clothes since I seem to wear the same five things over and over again. So I was sorting through it all trying to get rid of things I was ready to let go of and I noticed that all my clothes are pretty much the same 'don't-look-at-me-because-I'm-boring' sort of colors. It was a good laugh. Oh, the way I am and the things I do without even realizing.

And I am a writer, writer of fictions.

2009-05-14T05:43:00.000-04:00

It's thunderstorming right now. Everyone seems to love thunderstorms, but I never really have. It actually scares me sort of, especially at night when I'm trying to sleep. Someday I'll find someone who hates it as much as I do and right away propose that we might as well become best friends. This is only because I think rationally at all times.

Here's something I stole from Brian's page; it's nice:

Love story is so much prettier without the words. Did she never read Romeo and Juliet? They both kill themselves in the end and it was actually very unhappy.

I always like to close my eyes when I'm listening to instrumental music. That's some pretty badass cello playing. Why can't I be a real asian and be good at every classy instrument?

I've always done this thing where I have to match a voice to a face. Google images has always been there for me in matters like this. Some surprising and unexpected results in the past for me were: Raphael Saadiq, Newton Faulkner, Ben Folds, G. Love, Girl Talk, Moby...Micheal Jackson (did you know he's white!)

while I'm stealing from Brian, here's something else he found:
awkwardfamilyphotos.com it's hilarious. oh, family is a good thing.

hm, some random thinking:
general life rule: if you're going to write anything (worth writing) down, write it on moleskin
I think we can all agree that the only things in life that truly last forever are Nalgene bottles.
How to not feel so lonely all the time by anna phan: just settle.

So I bought a really pretty dress for my sister's graduation and it's all ithaca-y-ish, but I can't wear it because it's going to be a downer 56 degrees and raining. So I'm just going to have to wear sweatpants instead. No, not really. My mother would have a cow - and that would not be good because I'm sure three kids was already hard enough. In conclusion: Dear bad weather, don't blame yourself, but you're single-handedly ruining my life.

In a sort of but not really related note, I finally got around to reading Myth of Sisyphus. I liked it. It's a good read for those of you who are interested.

remember when Incubus encored with Aqueous Transmission

2009-05-06T16:49:00.000-04:00

I'm sick of school but I kind of don't really want it to be summer. Good grief. Can I not be completely ambivalent for once in my life?

I've been going to breakfast a lot, lately. I think people can tell that I don't really belong there. I mean, I am the only girl there who is constantly spilling food all over herself. No wait. That's me at all times of the day.

"There's so much darkness and secrecy surrounding them-- like the Bermuda Triangle. Nobody ever reports back from there." That's one of my favorite lines. I'll be proud if anyone knows where its from. I think I first watched a production of it at IC when I was like 14 or 15...so it was a lot more enjoyable reading it this time around.

Don't forget that Sunday is Mother's Day- so make a card for your momma or something. And try to somehow include flowers, if possible.

This is what I hate about the world:

let me prove my love for you by buying a little shiny rock that only costs one bajillion dollars

That is all.

I like to tell people that my mother's name is Mulan and my father's name is Jackie Chan. And that I never lie.

2009-05-04T01:09:00.000-04:00

This is me waking up in the morning and trying to be good at something. I actually like playing lying down more than I do sitting up. How silly. This one has more than a few glitches in it, but I like the camera view. So just accept my mistakes and my triangle fingers.

I like learning fun strums more than trying to play actual songs. I'm getting it slowly but surely. Except not exactly that surely, really. I'm really excited to show my dad. Maybe I'll get him to take out his guitar. I don't think he's played that thing since we were kids.

Isn't it so unfair how talented people never just have one talent? Instead, they have to have like, all of them...while the rest of us have absolutely nothing to show for. "Hi, my name's Bon-qui-qui and I'm good at EVERYTHING." Well hi, my name's anna and I wish I was good at at least something. (The moral of the story is: If I ever met anyone named Bon-qui-qui, I know that I would automatically like them.)

p.s. seven years ago today I went to the opening of Spiderman for my friend Kelsey's birthday. What fun to think about.

purify the colors, purify my mind.

2009-05-01T17:23:00.000-04:00

I'm currently listening to my ipod-commercial-songs playlist. Doesn't everyone have one of those? One word: Catchy. It's true. Apple enlightens to the world some pretty sweet beats. Oh, remember Fat Boy Slim from the 90's? They had that one hit wonder, Funk Soul Brother (Or maybe more people know Praise You). Anyway, it came up on shuffle the other day and it was fun. Their song, Gangster Tripping, is not bad to listen to, either.

This is one of Hy's videos of his students from Vietnam. I can't stop smiling because of it. I love how contagious laughter can be. It makes life substantially better.

And just for (interesting) giggles:
http://news.nationalgeographic.com/news/2009/04/090430-birds-dance-rhythm.html

Actually, there have been so many really amazing recent articles on Nat Geo, so browse if you want to. Here's what's most viewed: http://news.nationalgeographic.com/news/top15.html

I don't think I'll sleep tonight.

Let's hang out and watch Christopher Guest films.

2009-04-30T15:06:00.000-04:00

I wish I could write prettily. Whenever I try and fail miserably, I always think of that one part in Hamlet when they're reading one of Hamlet's letters to Ophelia and he's like, "blah blah I suck at writing poetry, but- I love you." I like that part.

I'm never subtle when I creepily people watch. It's a problem of mine that I should probably be less apathetic about.

To the left is what I stare at most nights as I'm trying to fall asleep. I go insane if anything is ever out of place. I really need to simplify. I spy...a rice cooker.

Things I don't respond well to:
change
empty spaces
most dairy products
people I hate completely

I salt and pepper my mango.

2009-04-29T17:46:00.000-04:00

Who actually has the energy to proofread a ten page paper after having to write ten pages?

http://www.nytimes.com/2009/04/27/opinion/27taylor.html?bl&ex=1241150400&en=408e0c2fd77cf45c&ei=5087%0A (read comments, too)

I really like this. It's from asofterworld fan art. Reminds me of Love and Mathematics by Broken Social Scene (Feel Good Lost).

Now it's all covered with daisies (you got it, you got it).

2009-04-28T09:23:00.000-04:00

Well, it's 6:30 and there is still a good number of people here in the library. Oh, Geneseo. I think I'll just stay here until class in the morning. And by morning, I mean 12:45. Even if I went back to my room, what would I do? Sleep? Not likely, but I wish. I can't really remember the last time I didn't fall asleep to the morning birds chirping. They're sweet. Why do so many people hate birds? They sing to you in the morning, for godsake. Maybe it's because of that movie, The Birds that came out of the 60's. It's anyone's guess, really.

Campus is absolutely beautiful right now. Sometimes I sort of almost feel bad for picking flowers, but I feel like nature doesn't mind so much. I put them to good use, anyway.

I have so not been in the mood for learning, lately. For serious, it actually hurts for me to think. Which is kind of poopy because I have a ridiculous amount of work to do from now until the end of the semester. I think I'm just going to camp for the first two weeks of summer and completely enjoy myself. Plus, I feel like sleeping outside forces you into a natural sleep-cycle. And it would be nice to take my tent out, but I'm even more excited for my new tent booties! They're down-filled and beautiful and good and warm and down-filled. and beautiful. Stop it, anna.

I have such bad comma usage. But there are just so many ambiguous situations in language that I never know what to do. So I just throw some in here and there if you haven't noticed.

Ughhh I need unmonitored internet service so I can download some new tunes. (Sorry for funding terrorism, M.I.A.) Get it?? Get the reference?? No, probs not.

That comic up there (a little more xkcd.com) basically defines who I am as a person in almost all ways that matter. It really is the best time of day, no doubt.

Iron and Wine and wine will always end in tears.

2009-04-26T07:39:00.000-04:00

This is from foundmagazine.com. Apparently it was found in an elementary school library in Lake George, NY. Oh the glory days of note-passing. Hehe. I like magic.

This kind of makes me wonder about comparing handwriting from childhood to handwriting in adulthood. I kind of want to find some old school projects, and look and see.

I cannot, for the life of me, get the strum pattern down for Somewhere over the Rainbow. I might be musically retarded. No really though, I wish I was more musically inclined. I've been playing a Lanikai concert from a girl downstairs, and I like it so much more than mine for some reason. I can't tell why, exactly. Something about the sound. I probably should have done some research before buying..I think I just wanted a soprano because they;re the smallest and cutest. I have terrible reasoning when aesthetics are involved.

I wish someone would come lay outside with me right now.

In other news, I may or may not be becoming catatonic!
I really like the phrase, "I may or may not be..." It's so absurdly funny and meaningless.

Classical Gas by Mason Williams reminds me of one thing.

2009-04-21T18:38:00.000-04:00

There are always these quotes that go along the lines of, "you do your thing, I'll do my thing blah blah blah there is no right way blah blah." The thing is, I don't believe in moral relativism. And I can honestly say that I don't think it's based on close-mindedness. I just think that people go along too easily with typical, wise-sounding inspirational quotes without giving them a second thought.

Oh hey, insomnia. Welcome back into my life:
I went to breakfast this morning...because I couldn't sleep and right when it hit 7:30 I made my way to MJ. The crazy thing is there were actually people there?! morning people are so weird...and seemingly happy. I guess I felt sort of healthy, too, as I was sitting there..you know, downing my eight strips of bacon. I'm running really low on my meal plan money. I knew I would eventually regret eating eight times a day.

There's this simple chord progression that I like so much I keep playing it over and over again. My neighbors must hate me by now. I played pretty softly in this because it was still pretty early (don't be jealous of how good my hair looks in the morning). I think one string might be a little out of tune. That, or I still just suck.

I'm obvs still a newb, but I like it :)

They should quit. Yes, they know.

2009-04-15T23:23:00.000-04:00

http://www.cnn.com/2009/POLITICS/04/15/tea.parties/index.html?iref=mpstoryview
come on, America. for realzzz? tea is delicious and healthy, next time learn from the past mistakes of your forefathers and dump coffee instead. Geez louise. Am I missing the point of the story? Maybe. I hate today's politics, I really do. Except for conspiracy stories. They are always fun and/or funny.

I think it's funny how I rationalize things to myself so I can sleep better at night. Like if I ever decide to just not wake up in the morning, I say to myself, "don't feel bad - just make up for it by swimming an extra 1000 yards tonight" and go back to sleep with my conflicting personalities appeased.

Ugh. I have two ten page papers due and a presentation to give next Thursday. And it really wouldn't be so bad if I knew how to manage my time responsibly- but let's be honest.

Important Things with Demetri Martin

Wed 10:30pm / 9:30c

"I would have taught you mathematics, bitch" is personally my favorite line.
Why do I like mathy nerd boys so much? They are so cute they make me weak at the knees.

One of these days, I'll write an entirely cohesive post and everything will be related.

it will be a pair of lilies, maybe

2009-04-13T00:34:00.000-04:00

I just read the Communist Manifesto for class (sorry Marx, but you haven't convinced me) and it made me think of this one line I came across a while ago:

"When we truly discover love, capitalism will not be possible and Marxism will not be necessary." --Will O'Brien

It's just kind of cutesy, I guess. Maybe a little too sweet and hopeful for my taste. I believe it was Nietzsche who said that Capitalism and Communism are essentially the same in that what is seen as ideal in both is the lowest human potential, and neither promotes true individuality. I vote one for objectivism? I think Humanities is such a great core class at this school, and I'm surprised other schools don't have something similar as a gen. ed. requirement. There's just some literature that everyone should read in their lifetime.

Oh, I have a new found love for used book stores?! I don't know how I never discovered them before. Books are so expensive and I basically went crazy when I was finding really good ones for a few dollars each. Plus, old books with a little wear and tear have such a good look to them. So on Friday, I lugged back 7 newly purchased books back to my room. I kind of want to quit school and read by myself for the rest of my life. Is that unhealthy?

It's been sort of warm. But not warm enough for me to walk to the waterfall. So I've been having to resort to the arboretum. Man, that place is great. It's all like, "look at all the trees" and "there's a garden, too" and "oh, look. there's the highway..."

...and oh "there are two people touching each other on that bench" ...and three feet to the left "there's a drug deal going on!" So, I'm kind of discouraged from being adventurous sometimes. Now I mostly just sleep in the grass.

This is from Lewis Carroll's classic Through the Looking Glass and What Alice Found There:

Alice laughed. "There's no use in trying," she said. "One can't believe impossible things."
"I dare say you haven't had much practice," said the Queen. "When I was your age, I always did it for half-an-hour a day. Why, sometimes I believed as many as six impossible things before breakfast."

To be honest, the book wasn't as enjoyable as I thought it was going to be. The creativity is more manifested in the movie.

Do you ever listen to The Flaming Lips and think of scary men in goofy animal suits?

2009-04-03T15:11:00.000-04:00

xkcd.com, a hilarious webcomic - check it out

I haven't been much of an aim fan lately, but I have officially linked this blog into my info.

"I used to hunt saber-toothed tigers all the time, thousands of years ago. Now I sit in front of a computer and don't get exercise."

I got my hands on the first season of Flight of the Conchords, and it's pretty hilarious stuff. Okay, and next:

Lately I have been thinking that it's okay to not go to class for some reason. I just love waking up and lying in bed forever way too much to ever give it up. What does it feel like to be a responsible person? I'll never know..

Don't be nice to Ali. He's my nemesis.

2009-04-02T15:24:00.000-04:00

The album is For Emma, Forever Ago. If you like it, you might as well check out the story behind the making. It's very sadsweet and heartfelt. Very Thoreau-ish, too.

Does anyone else lose socks all the time like I do? Where do they go? Like, you're just doing laundry one day and you notice that your sock drawer is half as full as it should be. And so you buy more, some time passes, and you realize you're back where you were with half as many socks. sigh. It's an endless cycle of mystery.

I fell asleep in the library again.

2009-04-01T04:32:00.000-04:00

I think every college kid can agree on the fact that campus libraries serve two main purposes for us all:

a) a place to be productive
b) a place to fall asleep when we realize that being productive is actually quite exhausting

here's a video that I could probably watch everyday for the rest of my life:

They are so cool! I love creative music making!

I'll end this with a bit from Peanuts:

Sometimes I lie awake at night and I ask, "Why me?", then a voice answers "Nothing personal, your name just happened to come up."

-The good man, Charlie Brown

jens lekman's voice

2009-03-31T17:47:00.000-04:00

Do you ever think about when someone's inclination is in a different direction than their natural talent? People don't always enjoy what they have natural capacity for. (I don't think I'll elaborate on ideas here because I'll really just ramble on forever and that would be fun for no one. so, just something to think about)

They played terrible music at the pool today. I think I subconsciously swim faster when they play bad music so I can just finish my set and get the hell out.

here's something pretty cool to look at

We all have something to learn from Calvin and Hobbes.

2009-03-30T04:04:00.000-04:00

I recommend asofterworld.com; it's bitter and honest, and it gets a bit harsh at times - it's really for all the sad kids around. shout out to my homies, I know there are some of you out there?

I went to mass earlier today. I still go every now and then. I don't really listen or receive communion, I just like to sit in sometimes. It's a nice feeling. Reminds me of childhood.

Oh, my sister sent me some neat videos a while back:

It's so fun and creative -just youtube PES and look for related videos!

makes me smile

2009-03-29T15:47:00.000-04:00

postsecret.com something to look at if you're not already checking religiously every Sunday

A few months ago I was thinking that my short little fingers are good for nothing except maybe the ukulele. Today, I bought a ukulele and I'm well excited. I probably won't have much time to practice with dedication any time soon, but summer should be good for that. I considered the possibility that I might just strum around with it for a few days and drop it like it's not hot, but I'll take my chances. I mean, what if it becomes my new best friend!

Dr. Kintz said something really profound once. She said, if you're doing anthropology and it doesn't make you cry your eyes out then you shouldn't even be doing it.

But Me and You are only ideas that we have made to describe what we see as the difference between us.

2009-03-29T06:37:00.000-04:00

I'm in one of my sigurros-obsessive phases right now. They come and go every once in a while. Really though, I think everyone should give them a listen. Trust me- some of the most beautiful sounds you'll ever hear.

As we are trying to think of a drinking game to play:

Me: let's play that one game... what's it called?
Dory: oh I don't know. That one game you used to play back when you were fun? All you do now is read.

no comment. it's so true.

Anyway, wowzerzz, you know?

I wish I could tell Joanna Newsom how much I love her art.

2009-03-28T04:09:00.000-04:00

Right now, I feel the way Joanna Newsom must have felt when she wrote En Gallop.

I think I'll start an honest blog.

2009-03-20T23:49:00.000-04:00

I think I'll start an honest blog so I can finally check something off my to-do list in life. But since I have to be honest, I probably won't talk about anything that matters.

Anywho, spring break is coming to an end. It's been a pretty swell time. I've been waking up every morning (yes, I'm actually up before noon - it's funny that I save this kind of behavior for breaks, but can barely make it up before midday when I actually have classes) and walking to the bakery where I order more coconut cream buns than anyone should probably eat in a lifetime. The coconut cream bun: a delicious silent killer. I don't really put on much weight, but I've probably taken a few years off my life. So don't all of you worry- people with fast metabolisms pay for it, too. Just not until later.

On Wednesday, I went to central park with mom. And there were so many people there enjoying the one warm day of weather that comes out of nowhere to give us hope for an approaching springtime, which we all know won't come soon enough, anyway. It was really cute -all the musicians rocking out and the families and the dog-walkers. It's such a rarity when I actually enjoy people. Why are Manhattan people so sophisticated and artsy and cool? There must be some sort of requirement to live there.

I also just finished my book. Ayn Rand is seriously becoming one of my favorite writers. I read some short essays freshman year for a philo class, but I wish I knew sooner how phenomenal her novels are. I also half fell in love with one of her characters. I half fell in love with a fictional character who wasn't a dreamy vampire with cold skin and luscious eyes...so, yeah. I think I can with reason call myself an individual. I shouldn't talk because I actually did read Twilight (you know, just to see what all the fuss was about) and shamefully enjoyed every bit of it- even though some of my brain cells died in the process.

Oh, funny story. I was at the library asking the librarian if an unshelved book was still on the cart, and she told me I reminded her of Juno. As I walked away, I recalled that Juno was actually a depressed mega-bitch. I was offended for a while before I realized it was probably just because I asked her for a copy of The Bell Jar. Oh, if only.

Bye now.